Fuck you, CBS! Oh wait, did I actually just tweet that? LuvU CBS!


When bad things happen, sometimes people panic. When people panic, other people tweet nasty things. It’s just the way things are nowadays.

But when your tweet negatively impacts a good thing for you, or maybe even your career, dontcha think maybe it’s time you should just get off the innerwebs entirely? The rest of us are entertained on a daily basis by famous people who suffer a catastrophic brain fart and send out a tweet that they later desperately wish they hadn’t, and apparently Rihanna is no different. Or maybe she IS different…

Before the Rice Vator video leaked (yes, I’m still trying to get Rice Vator to start trending) Rihanna had scored a major gig: her song (hey, it’s actually Jay-Z’s song) would open for Thursday Night Football on CBS for the whole half-season. Even better for her was that viewership of TNF would increase by more than 100% over previous seasons because it would finally be shown on broadcast television…and even trouncing (oh. my. god.) The Biggest Loser in the ratings.

But a perfect storm had happened: the Rice Vator video was leaked Monday, the Ravens were playing on TNF that same week, and Rihanna used to date some asshole who likes to hit women.

CBS didn’t have much time to think this thing through, but they were quickly getting grief for the plan to use a domestic violence victim to open the show for a team that employed a domestic violence offender. CBS ultimately decided the song would be scrapped for just that week, probably to prevent a major backlash from domestic violence victims, but the song would be used for the rest of the games. Sounds smart, right? And Rihanna would certainly understand, and embrace the use of the song in the other games, right?

Well, after five days Rihanna has finally made her feelings known about having her song pulled from TNF for that one game. She was penalized! Apparently she was made a victim all over again. Taking her F-bomb tweet into consideration, it was only a matter of minutes before CBS decided her song would now be pulled from opening TNF for the entire half-season. Wow…one tweet lost her a sweet gig.

But wait…in this age of egomaniacal instant-gratification by people with itchy twitter fingers, wouldn’t we have expected her tweet sooner than five days later? Like, maybe sooner than five HOURS later? Of course we would. That’s how it’s supposed to work.

But she had a plan.

Some football fans on Thursday night would see her opening number and say, “She looks familiar…who is that again?” Then they would never care again. Most fans wouldn’t give a shit who she is, bring on the game! What’s a girl to do to be noticed when she has to compete with football?

Easy answer: she carefully drafts a tweet message, shows it to her agent and friends, makes minor adjustments, weighs the pros and cons about sending the tweet, time the release of the tweet, and get tens of thousands of Favorites and Retweets plus WAY more publicity by torching her NFL bridges. It’s even MORE publicity than what she got after her ex beat the holy snot out of her. Thank you, CBS!

Point to Rihanna.


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